Sorsha's Bedroom

I look over where my father is indicating and I see him. "Phoenyx" I whisper as I smile and walk over to him, unsure if I should touch him. Fuck it. I pull him into a hug **I'm sorry**

I pull back as it registers to me what he said, I try pulling the power back into me and it goes, but only so far. "Yes well, your grandfather here seems to not want to let me see you and your sister, well the baby versions, it's pissing me off."

I look at him and whisper "I'm trying, I can't.... " Fuck! I close my eyes and focus on cutting myself off from the ley line, it's only intensifying my feelings. And Phoenyx may be right but I am not ready to speak to my father yet, I'm still not in control.

I sever the connection and force the rest of my power down, I open my eyes and look at him as he is smiling at me, gods so much like his father. I can't help but smile back. "I'm not hungry, what do you want to talk about? You have that.... look."

Now I do I think to myself. "Yes, I remember thinking he looked like shit, in fact I believe I commented on it. But I wasn't sure, you know because I was essentially high" I pause and recollect what Yemaya showed me "but no, he looked terrible." Shit. I am such an idiot. "Something's happened to him"

"Yes, that night we came back to the divide the seventh had been released. We learned Athair had been attacked by Lear, and the Io power was filtering out. Eventually there would have been nothing left and he and our heritage would have died."

"And so how did he stop that from happening?" Although I think I see where this is going. But I need to hear him say it.

"He sacrificed himself to save our heritage. That was the same night you left" I hung my head low. "His body now belongs to Faysal, and we thought he had died but he hadnt and he wants to talk to you but he can't unless you allow him too, we can do it two ways thru me? or you could be put into a dream state. It will be real like hes real but in your head, its up to you."

Holy fuck. "I....." I go and sit down on the bed and put my head in my hands. I look back up at Phoenyx and try again "I.... yeah okay, I guess through....." I stop and think about it. No that is probably a very bad idea. If Abaddon's soul is intact and he enters Phoenyx, I know I will feel that pull, which would be incredibly disturbing to say the least. "I think we better go with the dream state."

"Do I need to cold cock you or can you put yourself out?" I say smiling wickedly. "You arent really going to hurt Taran are you? I mean he didnt have a choice you were about to attack Grandad did you know that?"

I sigh "Yes I am fucking aware of it" shit! "Sorry! Fuck, I'm sorry. This anger, it comes and goes, I don't know how to make it stop. I'll figure it out though."

Not waiting for any sort of response I lay back down on the bed and pull on my powers, changing my brain waves like I did to that guy in the alley. In no time I am asleep.

I leave the room to give her some privacy. "I wonder whos about?"

Waking up in my bed I swear I could smell him on the sheets. I roll over on my side and clutch one of my pillows. "Phoenyx are you still here?" I whisper. No response. He must have left. It's just as well I think I need a minute to myself.

Materializing instantly in Mama's room. I stop and smile for a moment.

"He's fucking different aint he?"

Still laying curled on my side I wave my arm and motion for him to come over. He crouches down by the side of the bed and looks at me. I smile weakly at him. "Yes I guess he is different, and yet still the same to me. It's like he's who I always saw in him" I shrug. "Maybe being his soul mate I could see who he was destined to become."

"that is plausible, so you got your shit in check? wanna go suck up to grandad and hold your babies?"

I smile at him "Yes I would like that very much, well not really the sucking up part" I say as I start to sit up "I'm kidding, but I thought they were taken to the divide, can't we just go there now? And I can suck up to my father later?"

"As you wish, but I should warn you adult Ataahua is pissed off, and she wont take kindly to you being there. Im just warning you so your prepared. Okay?"

I nod my head "Yeah okay, I was expecting both of you to pretty much hate me so 50/50 is better than nothing I guess" And like mother like daughter I think to myself. "Let's go."

Appearing in my room I walk over and flop down on the bed. I lay there for a bit and decide before I totally nod off that I should at least give some warning to Alexis and Abaddon.

I send Lexi a message first. As I lay there dreading contacting Abaddon I drift off to sleep.

Waking up I open my clenched fist and feel the ring slip out of my hand. Rolling over on my side I lay in the dark and cry.

Fuck, I think I am going to be sick. Springing up out of bed I run into the ensuite and proceed to puke my guts out. I lay my head against the cold porcelein and hope that this is some sort of side effect of dissolving the soul mate bond. If that isn't the case, I'd really hate to think how fucked up this makes me that I am not only bawling over him like a fucking baby but puking over losing him as well. Maybe I am just overtired. Yeah, keep telling yourself that one.

Getting up I brush my teeth and then head to the shower, which ends up really being just me sitting in the shower, the spray long since having gone cold, but not caring, just thinking.

Getting out of the shower I get my shit together the best I can. Picking up the pants from where I left them on the floor I take the kids rings out of the pocket. Then I go back into the bedrrom and find that blasted ring on the bed. I slip all three onto my finger, the way they are meant to be worn. My finger tingles slightly as I slide them on. Great. I wait a second and the feeling subsides. I let out a shakey breath. Materializing on some fresh clothes I go to find the kids. I need to be with them right now. I shimmer out to my fathers room.